“The Red Shoes”

One of my friends at the mall told me that we get seven (7) prospective soul-mates. Then, what he suggests is that soul-mates are promised to us. So, does that mean we now get seven (7) tries at love? What if we never meet one of the seven? Are we to meet several? What then? Does that mean we are missing out on six (6) others? What if your partner divorces you or dies? Does that mean that you have then, six (6) other candidates that could replace the original partnership?

Well, here’s my take on things….

First of all, I am a traditional woman from the south, who although is highly ingrained in family, and believing in settling-down and having a family as a legacy, I think it depends on the individual, as to whether the theory of the, “seven (7) soul-mates,” applies. As a woman in the south, we are expected to partner or, ‘couple-up.’ A woman is expected to get married and have children. Now, whether it happens in that manner, it is up to you.

In fact, you have to find, ‘Mr. Long-term,’ first, not, ‘Mr. Right-Now,’ or even, ‘Mr. Next-week.’

You see I could say that I have failed miserably as a single-lady at 28 without any children. However, to whatever my past experiences were, which are not important I have not met my soul-mate. I do not think that I have met, ‘Mr. Future,’ yet. To any degree, first, I must formulate my mind around the concept that the American dream is what you make of it.

At twenty-eight years of age (28 yrs.), I never thought I would be an educated, beautiful, highly independent and an available young lady on the single-market. On the other hand, I am truly not at a point in my life that I have allowed myself to be open to settling-down, quite yet. Meanwhile, I question, “Am I searching for someone, who does not exist?” I mean, “Do I truly have a soul-mate, out there, somewhere waiting for me?”

The answer is…..NO! Not yet. I just have not met, ‘Mr. Future.’

I use the, “red shoes,” scenario to illustrate my point for you. I invented this story to show you, how you can shop around for your seven (7) prospective partners or shoes. Next, after completing an analysis of the stock or inventory that you have dated over the past year, stop and look back. Did you find the shoes that truly fit you? Be honest ladies and gentlemen, did you find the certain pair of shoes who complement all your features? Did you find someone who lifts you up to a higher plane? Did you find a pair of shoes that stabilizes your comfortable flavor, when lined with all the weight of the world on your foundation? Did the pair of shoes you are thinking of, bring-out the best in you? Is your pair of shoes, shoes you can wear each and every day to exploit the day’s successful highlights? Is the targeted pair, a pair that does not put an emotional and physical strain on you internally, which you project externally? Finally, do the shoes understand you, beyond communication? Furthermore, are the shoes, the same exact shoes that understand you beyond question and without words?

If the answer is no, you have not met, ‘Mr. Future.’ If you have not met, ‘Mr. Future,’ you have not met your red pair of shoes. Before you answer yes or no, let’s go through your stock or inventory over the past year, or few years if that gives you a better analysis. Let us begin.

1. You start shopping for the shoe. First, you try on one shoe. The right shoe looks good, but does not quite belong. The left shoe feels ok., except, the shoe does not bring out your best features. This pair of shoes is your, ‘orange pair.’ Your orange pair are the shoes you buy in desperation of trying to fill a void for another pair you lost. The one that you are willing to settle for.

2. The salesperson brings out the next pair, he or she suggests for you. The, ‘green pair,’ looks appealing, other than the commendable potential, the shoes has to grow on you. However, you contemplate if you will abandon the green pair somewhere in the near future. The green pair is the pair that you use temporarily for therapy to get over the last pair, which you rubbed the wrong way. The green pair takes some small abuse that the last pair left in your spirit.

3. Next, you ask the salesperson to bring you, the pair you see on display in the window. Now, you are searching for, ‘the blue pair,’ that you want to compliment you to make you look and feel nice all over. Although, you want the feeling to resonate on the inside and out, you want the blue pair to touch your soul. The blue pair, you believe will resurrect the melody of your life. In reality, after purchasing the blue pair, you take the shoes back and exchange them. The blue pair, you discover still does not give you permanent reassurance to replace the void you feel. No, you want a pair that will last more long-term. The blue pair is simply the pair to bring you into consciousness. Indeed, you learn, you are going through a transition.

4. Now, ‘the dangerous yellow pair,’ is the one you try on for pure sport. The yellow, dangerously gives you the support you need. However, the romance you feel from the others is a little off. Consequently, the yellow shoes makes you stumble a bit, nevertheless, you grow from this purchase. You keep the yellow pair for the constant support the shoes give you. Though, you stop and ask yourself eventually, whether, “if you have found that ‘real,’ pair yet, which replaces all the others?” The answer you come to is…"no!" You realize the yellow pair is the friend you are so close to, but, is only good in respects for a total platonic outing or discussion. Furthermore, the appeal is only so far, until you realize you have no romantic or true connection with this man or woman, but a kind-platonic friendship. Therefore, don’t confuse the carnal needs you feel, as the total romance, which you could experience with your soul-mate.

Today, as you may have guessed. If you refused the yellow pair, you are in the same predicament as I am. I believe in a hero. One soul-mate, whom you are predestined to be with. Call it faith or being totally saturated in my southern-roots, I believe you have one person you are truly fated to be with.

In Mathew 19:4-6 (KJ), God teaches us that we must cling to one another in a relationship, “and he answered and said until them. Have ye not read, that he which made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder.” The Bible suggests here that we become one entity. Let us dig further.

In Ephesians 5:33 (KJ), the Bible suggests that “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” What this verse says to me is that we are to be as one and love ourselves as one flesh. Now, this verse does not suggest that we are soul-mates, but to act as one being and as to respect that we are one in a partnership. Let us go even further.

In I Peter 3:7 (KJ), the Bible suggests that “Likewise, ye husbands dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” What this verse expels to me is that we are only for one person, as one is only for us. However, we must seek God first, before He reveals that one certain destiny, unto us. He is the only one who can grant favor in our lives, to see the certain one, who will complete our flesh.

5. Therefore, you have one person who can complete you. One person to complete your being and the one person whom is a soul-mate that you did not have to fight to be with. So the shoes you find when journeying through multitudes of options when shopping is the, ‘red pair of shoes,’ which you connect with instantaneously. The red pair is the shoes that captivate your attention like sonar, or a complete eclipse. The red pair is the ones you do not have to painstakingly shift through. The red pair are your destiny. The ones, you feel almost find you. When you put them on, you can feel them in your spirit completing your grace, before you ever purchased them. The red pair is the predestined someone who will lead you towards a brighter and successful future. He or she serves you with plenty of encouragement. The red pair is the shoes that will love you, because loving you, benefits the one flesh, as the both of you. The red pair is infact the cure-all, to all before and all after, and everywhere in between. The red shoe is a part of you. You feel that the red shoes do complete you.

You see, it is not about the, “Mr. Right-now.’ Your search is about the, ‘when.’

Though, I realized until I can love myself enough to allow all my guards to come down, I cannot be happy with red shoes. I must be comfortable enough to be totally alone in faith with God, and alone with my own company in the Lord, before I can get to know someone else. Before I can tackle the red shoes finding me, I must know myself. Furthermore, I have to be in-tuned with the laws of God to know my best, and be secure in His trust. Also, I have to be secure in my own skin, before, ‘Mr. Future,” will surprise me. Besides, I have faith that the red shoes will find me, right.

Mr. Red-Shoes will know me, before, he has even seen me. His shining-blessing will gather like roses in my heart, resonating so vastly that even his own soul can do nothing, than to be with me. In marriage, he cannot be without me, and he cannot live without my presence in his life. I will be a piece of him than before, when he was searching for me, besides drifting through life trying to fly from the worm-whole that could not stop taking in all previous options. Therefore, there will not be a drift between our hearts, like losing souls as June Carter & Johnny Cash, my grandparents and my great-grandparents. Finally, I will stop searching, when love happens.

In conclusion, He or she will be a part of your soul. Someone who attacks your life like a roaring, “ring of fire,” and that you know is your strongest desire (Johnny Cash, 1963). As far as my feet, I have not met or embraced seven prospective soul-mates. I truly feel, you have only one. Hell, it took, June, twelve (12) to fifthteen (15) years before Johnny, ‘got it together,’ to allow them to finally mesh. Or maybe it’s like that Michael Buble song, “Maybe I just haven’t met you yet,” (Crazy Love, 2009).